Ask Madden

Hey guys, it's Reza. Kevin allowed me to guest write here. Firsrt, let me begin by saying that I found this thing hysterical when Darin Rupinski gave me a link to it. Now, let's get down to business. Today was an okay day at school. I had hardcore gas for most of it; I pity the vertically challenged fool who walked behind me in the halls. Nothing too interesting...I had a math test...The most interesting part of the day was sixth and seventh periods..I had the Academy of Finance luncheon. Mr. Hand said we were the best part of the school and that he told those people whjo are coming to evaluate the school that we are the best they have to offer. If only he knew. After we ate (catered food, by the way), we mingled amongst the elite of Rockland. I offered a few suggestion to Mr. Hand while mingling. First, I told him to do away with that Pin Code system at lunch. According to it, my name is either Jessica Watson or Dely Patrickson. Unless I have a missing vagina, the system sucks. Mr. Hand agreed and said it wasn't his idea to begin with and that he doesn't like it...I got the hint that he did away with it, at least for now. My other suggestion was that the school installs buffer zones between stalls in the guy's bathroom so that more than three people can pee at a time. People only use every other stalls because no body wants the next joe coe getting a show (that rhymed). Suprisingly, he said that that idea has been flouting around for a couple of years. Also during the lunch thing, I flexed my spanish muscles and showed off all that I had learned in the years I've taken spanish in school. basically, it amounted to...

"YO TENGO TRES HUEVOS FUERTES...DOS PARA HACER NINOS Y UN PARA BUEN SUERTE." The jist of it is, "I have three strong balls, two for making babies and one for good luck." Mrs. Illiana Eckert, who is on the school board, apparently speaks spanish since she was laughing her head off.

I also had a physics test today. I pulled a hiroshima on that one. Well, I got to go seeing as how I'm going to have a case of faucet ass in a moment or two (just had number 5 at taco bell...even though I ordered a number 6). Adios for now. Viva La Revolucion y El Menu Dolar a las Wendy's.